When a woman says that she loves her children more than her husband
* She is clearly telling a lie *
She can leave her children with her neighbours
* But she will not leave her husband with a neighbour for a minute *
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what i if i told u
u read the first line wrong😂❌✔
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Today I was listening to radio they were talking about Mandela, I watch TV Mandela, I go out people are talking about Mandela, now I’m in the tavern I’m afraid to open my wallet because I will also see Mandela 😂😂
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A lecturer come in the class and pointed straight at me with a ruler and said to the class: class,,!! At the end of this ruler stands a fool .
I stood up and said to him: But sir this ruler has two ends, or you mean all the ends ,?? As am talking am burned from the varsity until further notice
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Your neighbors will always see the girl you brought home late at night…
But will never see the thief who came to rob you in the middle of the day
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Somebody kidnap cassper and force him to quit rap😫😫😫
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You never actually watched a full movie coz u blinked 🤞🤞😁
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I don’t know who needs to hear this but sell that iPhone and eat
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That moment when you just lost a fight and when you get home you start thinking about all the kung fu moves you could’ve used
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Me: My bitch hasn’t texted me in two hours
Brain: She’s probably cheating on you
Me: No, I bet she’s just sleeping
Brain: but she slept yesterday, didn’t she?
Me: OMG that bitch! How much sleep does she need???
Brain: Breakup
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Apart from “I love you,I miss you,I can’t live without you” what other jokes do you know??
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WHEN I WAS YOUNG
I’d put my arms in my shirt 👕 and told people I lost my arms💪
• Would restart the video game whenever I knew I was going to lose❎🚫
• Had that one pen with four colors, and tried to push all the buttons at once😔
• Waited behind a door 🚪 to scare someone, then leaving because they’re taking too long to come out 🚶 .
• Faked being asleep, so I couldbe carried to bed🏠
• Used to think that the moon🌚followed our car🚗
• Tried to balance the switch between On/ Off💢.
• Watching two drops of rain roll down window 💦pretending itwas a race 🏁 .
• The only thing i had to takecare of was a school bag 👝 .
• Swallowed a fruit seed I was scared to death that a tree 🎄was going to grow in my tummy.
• Closed the fridge extremely slowly to see when the lights went off😜👀.
• Walked into a room,. forgot what you needed😕, Walked out,and then remember😮.
If u really went through this can u drop a”HI”
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black girls and fake love for teddy bear and flowers..you people love food,money,cars,Alcohol and Attention!!
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Me:sorry boss, my car has broken down so i wont come to work
Boss:what about a taxi?
Me:i dont have a taxi
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I have done so many mkstakrs in my life
But i have never left a wedding ceremony without eating never
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A moment of silence to those girls who think their current boyfriends will marry them.*
Am waiting for the rejected ones.
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