A man and his wife came home drunk and went to sleep.
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So you scrolling for what cause I said they went to sleep.??
Do you want to wake them up?
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A man and his wife came home drunk and went to sleep.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
So you scrolling for what cause I said they went to sleep.??
Do you want to wake them up?
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*Ladies, If you play your man like a football,
another woman will catch him like a goalkeeper,
you will regret watching the highlights*
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Shortest conversation I have ever had with a woman:
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Me: Ithin iNumber yakho
Her : Ayisho lutho, why?
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Nyaa came from school and dancing.
His father wondered what made so happy and decided to ask.
Dad : Son I have never seen you in this mood for a
while now…..any good news u want to share?
Nyaa : Dad next year you won’t be buying any textbook, notebooks and writing materials…..
Dad : That’s my son, why …. did you win a Scholarship?
Nyaa : No! Dad I’m repeating the same class
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Y MEN R NOT ALLOWED 2 RUN ADVICE IN LOVE COLUMNS IN MAGAZINES N NEWS PAPERS
Hi uncle Nyaa: “I am a lady aged 26, I left my husband wit de maid n baby @ home n I drove 4 just about 2km from home.
My car engine started 2 overheat, so I had 2 turn back n get another car.
When I got home I found my husband in bed wit our maid, I don know wat 2 do now, pls help me.”
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Uncle Nyaa’s Reply: “Overheating of engine after such a short distance can b caused by problems associated wit de radiator.
U need 2 check oil n water level in ur engine b4 u start ur journey.
U must also make sure ur car is serviced regularly 2 avoid problems in future, hope dis will help!!!
Oh one more thing if it does happen, don go back home, call ur insurance.”
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A man at work calls home and his 8 years old daughter picks the phone:
“Hi honey, this is daddy. Is mommy near the phone?”
“No daddy she is upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Paul.” The little girl quipped.
“After a brief pause daddy says, “But honey you haven’t got an uncle Paul!”
“Oh yes I do, and he is upstairs in the room with mommy right now.”
Brief pause,“ Uh okay then, this is what I want you to do: put the phone down on the table, run upstairs, knock on the bedroom door, and shout to mommy that daddy’s car has just arrived at the gate.”
“Ok daddy just a minute….”
A while later the little girl comes back to the phone, “Done it daddy.
””What happened honey?”
“Well, mommy got scared and jumped out of the bed naked, ran round the room screaming, tripped over, and knocked her head on the staircase ,now she is not moving at all.”
“What about Uncle Paul?” asked Dad. He jumped out the window into the swimming pool, but I guess he didn’t know you emptied the water last week. He hit the bottom and I think he’s dead.”
After a really long pause this time… Daddy says, “Swimming pool, but we don’t have a swimming pool! Is this 486-5731?”
“No, this is 486-5713” “Sorry wrong number….!!!!”
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TODAY, Don’t think of saying any UNKIND W0RD, think of the people who can’t speak.
Don’t complain about the FOOD yu eat,
some have nothing.
Don’t complain about LYFE, many die
young.
When you’re TIRED of your job, think of the jobless, the disabled & those who wish they had urs.
When SAD TH0UGHTS seem to put you
down, paint a SMILE on your face & thank GOD you’re alive n you’re still around.
LYFE’s a gift. LIVE IT WELL
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I do believe that GOD above put me here for you to LOVE. He picked you out among the rest because he know I’d love you best.
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Don’t gain the world and lose your soul,
wisdom is better than silver or gold.
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I wish to belong to you,
I’ll be the one you’re looking for and
we’ll be the one heaven’s searching for!
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The secret of life is not to do what you like but to like what you do.
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Sometimes we forgive people simply
because we want them to remain in our lives.
Even when we should actually just let go.
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Never be dependent to anyone in this world because even your own shadow leaves you when you’re in darkness.
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We waste time looking for the perfect lover,
instead of creating the perfect love.
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After you drop her off, you hear kidz argue
“Unamanga lena emlethe izolo it was A GTI lena i i R-Line ned Zimhlophe zoy2
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Did u know?
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Umsuzo unaka njengama simba.
so make usuza usuke usinyela yazi
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