ਜਿਨਾ ਮਜ਼ਾਕ ਦੁਨੀਆ ੳਡਾਉਦੀ ਹੈ,
ਉਨੀ ਹੀ ਤਕਦੀਰ ਜਗਮਗਾਦੀ ਹੈ,
ਨਾ ਘਬਰਾੳ ਯਾਰੋ
ਜਦ ਰਹਿਮਤ ਰੱਬ ਦੀ ਹੁੰਦੀ ਹੈ,
ਜਿੰਦਗੀ ਪਲ ਵਿੱਚ ਬਦਲ ਜਾਦੀ ਹੈ..!!!
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A man read d story of Daniel
Nd decided to praticalise it he went inside d lion zone nd he passed d first loin nothing happen nd he said (god s at work) he went inside
Behold d sound of bones were heard
Nd its was written d man die
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The Best Way To Smuggle Drugs Is To Place Them Up A Dog’s Ass.
That Way, Even If The Sniffer Dog Suspects Anything,
The Officials Will Think It’s Just Horny.
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Why Mother is always so Special?
When I came home in the Rain,
Father asked :”why didn’t u take an
umbrella??
” Sister advised : “why didn’t u wait till the
rain stopped??
” Brother angirly warned :”Only after getting
a cold u will realize!!
” But Mother,while drying my hair,said:
“Stupid Rain !
couldn’t it wait till my child came
home…??!!
That’s why!
All mothers are special,GOD bless umaNdlovu wami bese eblesser lowakho umama. 4 those who lost their mothers um sorry zithandwa, they still love you wherever they are and I LOVE YOU TOO.
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Yesterday I was at the mall, when I went to a public toilet. Immediately when I sat down. i had this conversation with an unknown
man
Man: hello
Me: yebo
Man: what are you doing there
Me: same thing you are doing there I guess
Man : baby I’m too horny ngingeza ngalapho
Me: (surprised ) Bhuti asazani mina nawe so please singaphaphelani
Man: okay baby, oh before I forget ngizokupha le R2200
Me : ( thinking “but R2200 for one round is a lot of money”) okay ke bhudi
Man : thank honey
Me:(by that time besengicabange lentsha tsha icavella) yiza Phela, but you must give me the money first
Man : baby I have to call you later there’s some idiot who answer all my question when I’m talking to you
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रुट्ठी बैठी … न्यू कवै तन्नै आज फेर पी ली … तेरी लाइफ मैं मेरी जगाह के है … पुराणी सिम बरगी … जब जी करया घाल दी , जब जी करया लिकाड़ दी … 😏
तो आ जा नैं लाइफ टाइम रिचार्ज बणकै … जिंदगी भर दूसरी सिम की सोचूं भी कोनी
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फूफाजी को रोमांटिक मुङ मे देखकर फूफी बोलीं : एक बात सुनिए आप मेरे लिए क्या कर सकते हो?
.
फूफाजी : जो तुम हुकुम करो, स्वीट हार्ट.
.
फूफी : चाँद ला सकते हो, मेरे लिए?
.
फूफाजी कमरे मे गए और कुछ चीज छिपा कर लाये और फूफी से कहा आँखे बंद करो.
.
और वो चीज़ फूफी के हाथों में रख दी. फिर फूफी से आँखे खोलने को कहा. उसे देखकर मेरी फूफी की आँखों में आंसू छलक आये. उनके हाथो में एक आइना था जिसमे फूफी का चेहरा नज़र आ रहा था.
.
फूफी : ओह माई गॉड, आप मुझे चाँद सा समझते हो?
.
फूफाजी बोले : नहीं मैं तो आपको सिर्फ ये समझा रहा था कि जिस मुँह से चाँद मांग रही हो वो सुरत आईने में देखी है कभी…….
.
😳😳😳😳😳😳
.
फिलहाल फूफा जी हास्पिटल के आईसीयू में भर्ती हैं, उसी आईने से उनके पूरे शरीर में यहाँ… वहाँ… न जाने कहाँ कहाँ… कट लगे हुए हैं.
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Jo marji Mang lai Har cheej kurban hai Bas jaan na MaNgi
kyu Ki tu Hi meRi JaAn eee
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Don’t compare yourself with other
if u do u insult yourself
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‘Stop telling jokes dad ‘{Son}
Nah I already made you{Dad}
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Niggas with no beards should have a
meeting and discuss their gender
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The amount of lipstick some guys have
swallowed in the name of kissing is
enough to paint two local governments
schools
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I don’t think you will stop laughing at this
one..??
A man ordered for a voice automated robot
car that does anything he tells it to do
correctly without any error.
He got the car and started sending it on
errands. He became very proud of what the
car could do without mistakes.
One day, he was home and his wife told him
to tell the car to go and pick the children
from school as she was very tired.
The man agreed and said to the car…
Car, go and bring my children from school.
The car went and didn’t return in time as
expected, they knew something must be
wrong.
Several hours later and no car, the man
became apprehensive.
He dressed up and got ready to lodge a
report at the police station.
As he and his wife stepped outside they saw
the car coming with an overload of children.
The car parked right in front of them and
said… “These are your children sir..!”
In the car were their Landlady’s two
daughters, his wife’s best friend’s daughter,
his secretary’s son and their neighbours
two sons.
The Wife in full anger…
Don’t tell me all these are your children..??
The man asked her calmly…
First you tell me why our children are not in
the car..??
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When I was in school, I used to ask a lot of questions….!!
One Day I asked Ms. Doris, our English teacher:”
Why do.we ignore some letters in pronunciation. eg the letter….’H’…….in Hour, Honest, Honor….. e.t.c………???”
Ms. Doris: “We are not ignoring them; they are considered silent.” …!!
(I was even more confused…..??
During the lunch break, MS. Doris gave me her packed
lunch & asked me to heat it in the cafeteria.
I ate all the food and returned her an empty container….!!
Ms. Doris:—- “What happened, I told you to go and HEAT my food & you are returning me an empty container??”
Me: — “.Madam I thought ‘H’ was silent”
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एक आदमी रस्ते से जा रहा था उसे एक आवाज़ सुनाई दी ” रुको ” और वो रुक गया तभी उसके पास से एक ट्रक तेज़ी से गुज़रा और उसकी जान बच गयी…. उसने उस आवाज़ का शुक्रिया अदा किया और चल पड़ा ………
कुछ दिनों बाद वो पहाड़ी रस्ते से गुज़र रहा था उसे फिर आवाज़ सुनाई दी ” रुको ” जैसे ही वो रुका आगे वाली पहाड़ी गिर गयी और उसकी फिर से जान बच गयी
आदमी ने फिर से शुक्रिया अदा करते हुए पूछा आप कौन हो जो हर बार मेरी जान बचते हो ? और मेरी शादी के time कहाँ थे ? 🤔🤔🤔
जवाब आया ” आवाज़ मैंने उस वक़्त भी दी थी अब DJ बजवा ले या आवाज़ सुन ले
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दुनिया के किसी भी पिता ने अपने पुत्र को पढ़ाई का महत्व इतने सरल तरीके से नहीं बताया होगा —–
“परीक्षा मे तेरे द्वारा दिया गया हर गलत उत्तर ,
तेरे भविष्य मे होने वाले हनीमून को ,
स्विसज़रलेण्ड से हरियाणा ले आएगा !
ये ध्यान रखना ।”
लड़का तुरंत पढ़ने बैठ गया !
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