i met you then all the stupid
love songs made sense
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A frog goes to a fortune teller to find out if he will ever be lucky in love.
The fortune teller reads his palm and tells the frog, “I have good news and I have bad news. Which would you like to hear first?”
The frog asks for the good news first.
The fortune teller says, “You are going to meet the most beautiful girl, who is going to be very interested in you and will want to know all about you. She will want you to open up for her and you will give her your heart.”
“That’s great!” says the frog. “But what’s the bad news?”
“Well, you’re going to meet her in Biology class.
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They had great seats right behind their team’s bench.
After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience.
“Oh, I really liked it,” she replied, “especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn’t understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents.”
Dumbfounded, her date asked, “What do you mean?”
“Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it, and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, ‘Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!’ I’m like, hello? It’s only 25 cents!”
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The waitress asks for their orders. The guy says, “A hamburger, fries, and a coke,” and turns to the ostrich, “What’s yours?”
“I’ll have the same,” says the ostrich.
A short time later the waitress returns with the order. “That will be $18.40 please.” The man reaches into his pocket and, without looking, pulls out the exact change for payment.
The next day, the guy and the ostrich come again and the guy says, “A hamburger, fries, and a coke.”
The ostrich says, “I’ll have the same.”
Again the guy reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change. This becomes routine until one night they enter the restaurant and the waitress asks, “The usual?”
“No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato, and salad”, says the guy.
“Me too,” says the ostrich.
The waitress brings the order and says, “That will be $42.62.”
Once again the guy pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table. The waitress can’t hold back her curiosity any longer. “Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change out of your pocket every time?”
“Well,” says the guy, “several years ago I was cleaning my attic and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it a genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there.”
“That’s brilliant!” says the waitress. “Most people would wish for a million dollars or something, but you’ll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live!”
“That’s right. Whether it’s a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there,” says the guy.
The waitress asks, “But, sir, what’s with the ostrich?”
The guy sighs and answers, “My second wish was for a tall chick with long legs who agrees with everything I say.”
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A man enters a bar and the bartender comes over and asks, “Can I help you, sir?”
The man answers, “What does a cup of coffee cost in this place?”
The bartender says, “That would be $2.60.”
“Alright, I’ll have one,” says the man. He takes 26 dimes out of his wallet and throws them all on the ground. The bartender doesn’t want to get involved in a fight so he just picks up the money and he brings the man his coffee.
A week later, the same man enters the bar. He orders a coffee again but this time he pays with a five dollar bill.
The bartender smelled an opportunity for revenge so when he brings the coffee, he throws 48 nickels on the ground as change. The man drinks his coffee leaving the change on the ground. A few minutes later he throws two dimes on the floor and orders a second coffee.
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Remember the good times, be strong during the difficult times,
love always, laugh often, and thank God every day
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It always feels good to have someone to brighten up your day
so if things aren’t going good for you lately,
I just want to say keep your head up.
Everything will fall into place at the right moment
and at the right time
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Human beings are very strange.
They have ego of their knowledge but,
they don’t have knowledge of their ego
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Take control of your destiny.
Believe in yourself.
Ignore those who try to discourage you.
Avoid negative sources, people, places, & habits
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Be strong enough to let go and wise enough to
wait for what you deserve.
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A forced love will never last.
Never beg to be loved.
Never beg for attention
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Thank you God, not only for all the blessings,
but for the frustrations which have helped me
become a better person
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You don’t have to be rich or extremely good looking to keep your girl.
If you can invest attention, care, loyalty and respect to a woman
then you’re already ahead of the game.
It’s about being confident with yourself
and women like men who are confident.
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Thank you for the broken heart
Thanks for all the persons that hurt me
I really appreciate what you did for me
Maybe someone will read this and say she is crazy
But wait do you know why im saying thank you ?
Well,because they made me stronger
They made me learn how to heal my wounds alone
To cry all night and to wake up in the morning smiling
To apperciate the right persons
To protect my heart from betrayal attacks
And the most important of all to turn to alllah only allah
Good night nice dreams and a prayer that will come true
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When Your Life Is In Darkness,
Pray God And Ask Him To Free You From Darkness.
Even After You Pray, If Your Still In Darkness,
Please Pay The Electricity Bill.
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A teacher is talking to a student.
Teacher: Did your father help you with your homework?
Student: No, he did it all by himself.
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