Son: Mom, when I was on the bus
with Dad this morning, he told me to
give up my seat to a lady.
Mom: Well, you have done the right thing.
Son: But mum, I was sitting on daddy’s lap.

CALLER:”Hello,Mr Hlongwane, You have won
a trip for two to USA,who are you gonna
take with you sir?”
ME:”I’m not taking anyone, I will go twice!

The way I enjoy when someone is begging
me… I just can’t wait to be an ancestor…

Stop asking for lifts petrol is expensive.
Mofaya ( energy drinks) are R10 buy them and walk

On judgement day I’ll be wearing a Zimbabwean flag to notify jesus that i cant go to hell twice

When you’re on a call with your girlfriend and sje forgets to hang up and you hear her saying thats my step father

🐼 I feel sorry for ladies dating DJs🎼🎧🎤📀🎵🎶
When the party is over, you have to remain and help with speakers and cables

If a woman get angry because you came
back late @ night ,she’s right cz it’s danger
out there
.
Please Gents respect them and come back
In the Morning

My neighbour’s son just gave me a grade 1
maths to solve.
.
Please pray for me because I’m about to
disgrace myself..

If you ask a girl “How are you?”& she replies
“I am not fine” don’t ask her why?
Its a trap! Just tell her “May God be with you

I tried to drown my troubles the other night
but the wife doesn’t like swimming.

A Girl Returns Home After 5 Yrs.

FATHER: (Angry) Where the hell have you been all these years?!
GIRL: I was working as a Prostitute in California
FATHER: What!!! Get out of my house you Whore! I don’t want to see u or your face again do you understand?!
GIRL: (Crying) Before I go dad, I came to give you $2.5million cheque, and here is 1 million for my brother. I have bought a big house in Los-angels for you with everything in it including a Benz & a Hummer.
Bye dad.
FATHER: What kind of work did you say you were doing?
GIRL: (Crying out loud) A prostitute dad!
FATHER: Come and give daddy a hug, I thought you said you were a ‘PROSECUTOR

When She’s Explaining How Her Man Played Her,,
And You Gotta Act Surprise Like Aint Gonna Do The Same

Private school: Good morning class
Learners: Good Morning Teacher

Government school: Good Morning Class
Learners: Goooooooood Mooooorniiiing Teeeeaaacheeeeer