3 common lies from guys:
I’m sorry,
I love you,
I won’t hurt u.

3 common lies from girls:
I’m fine,
I’m not mad at u,
I don’t love you.

*I know there are so many things dat won’t be tolerated in 2018 buh these are some random QUOTES dat are free to enter 2018*

1. Being kissed does not mean you are loved.
Ask Jesus about Judas😂😂😂😂

2. 80% of cute girls are single because all boys
think she definitely has a boyfriend!
😂😂😂😂

3. Welcome to Africa where Jesus sends you a
whatsapp message and threatens to kill you if
you do not send it to 20 people😂😂😂

4. No matter how light skinned you are, your
shadow will always be black😂😂😂

5. Gaining weight while you owe me money is a
sign of Disrespect. # LOLZ😂😂😂😂

6. The distance between Egypt and Israel is
about 613km but it took moses and Israelites 40
years to complete their journey. On average each day
they walked only 43 metres, yes only 43 metres,
almost half of what Usain Bolt do in 5 seconds. I just
wish if moses was around to explain this
Laziness😂😂😂😂

7. The reason why some other guys treats you
better than your boyfriend is because they
haven’t slept with you yet.😂😂😂😂

8. Some ladies will be matching purses with
clothes But cannot match babies to their real Daddies #
WINKS *😂😂

9. MARY was a virgin and she married a
carpenter (JOSEPH). You are not a virgin and you are
waiting for a billionaire to marry you?
I will not say anything😳😂😂😂😂

10. No African girl will choose six packs over
six cars, so stop going to the gym and go to
work # FACT😂😂😂😂

11. If the government would ban women from
using makeup, a lot of kids will not recognise
their mothers😂😂😂😂

12. The only person a woman attentively
listens to and obeys sincerely and does exactly
as he say is a PHOTOGRAPHER, otherwise if you’re not a
photographer, sit down and be strong😂😂😂😂

13. You haven’t moved on if you still remember
your Ex’s phone number. I’m not gonna argue
with you.
😂😂😂

14. Slim Girls who go for jogging at dawn, what do
you want to lose again…
Your life?😂

She will text you saying gudnyt honey nd still text another guy
same time nd say i’m at your gate sweet!!

So, I decided to visit my friend in the
surbubs:
Question: “What would you like to drink …
fruit juice, soda, tea, milo, chocolate, or
coffee?”
Answer: “Tea please”
Question: Ceylon tea, herbal tea, bush tea,
honey bush tea, ice tea or green tea?”
Answer: ” Ceylon tea please”
Question: “How would you like it? Black or
white?”
Answer: “White please”
Question: “Milk, whitener, or condensed
milk?”
Answer: “Milk please”
Question: “Goat milk, camel milk or cow
milk?”
Answer: “Cow milk please.”
Question: “Milk from Freeze land or
Afrikaner cow?”
Answer : ” Afrikaner cow please.”
Question: ” Warm or cold?”
Answer: “Warm please.”
Question: “Full cream, low fat or fat free?”
Answer: “Umm … I’ll rather take it black
please.”
Question: “Would you like it with sweetener,
sugar or honey?”
Answer: “With sugar please.”
Question: “Beet sugar or cane sugar?”
Answer: “Cane sugar please.”
Question: “White, brown or yellow sugar?”
Answer: “Just forget about the tea. I’ll have a
glass of water instead please.”
Question: “Mineral or still water?”
Answer: “Mineral water please.”
Question: “Flavoured or non-flavoured?”
Answer: “Hey f**k man! Just get me water
from the river… I don’t want to know which
river, and stop asking me too many
questions.

Don’t tell me your secrets
cause when I get to
bae’s place I’ll start
saying everything.

When u try to apologize to your 2001 girlfriend
Babe I’m so sorry
Her:mxm Buzz off ….dont talk to me talk to my lawyer

I was in a taxi sitting next to a beautiful lady…I decided to ask for her digits
“`
She took out her phone from her bag,
switched it off infront of me and said:
“Sorry my battery is dead”
“`
☆☆☆Even now im still fainting☆☆☆

In A bus Today
`
`
Conductor: Nice dress
☆
Lady: Thanks!
☆
Conductor: Nice earrings
☆
Lady: Thanks
☆
Conductor: Nice Lipstick
☆
Lady: wooow thanks
☆
Conductor: But still you are not looking beautiful

When u are being beaten up in a fight and then someone shouts “let them fight”
`
`
Bro u will think the devil is the referee

Skinny Chicks With Small Butts Be Like “Don’t
Touch My Butt” Instead Of “Don’t Touch My ass bones”