Banta:-santa tere ghar se mujhe hamesha hansne ki aawaz aati rahti hai.
Santa:-are yaar, meri biwi jab mujhe joote se marti hai, agar mujhe lag jaata hai to who hansti hai aur agar nahin lagta to main hansta hoon.

Kanjoos santa ka achanak chat se pair fisal gaya aur wo neeche girne laga.
jaise hi teesri manzil per uske kichen ki khidki ke samne se guzra,
apni biwi se bola,
mere liye aaj ka khana mat banana.

Sardar ji; Bhagwan mujhe dard de,
Dukh de,tention de,mujhe barbad kar de,mere piche BHoot laga de, Bhagwan;abe sale ek line me bol ke biwi chahiye

Sardarji fixed an answering machine at home.
Two days later he disconnected it because he was getting complaints like”Saala phone utha ke bolta hai ghar pe nahin hai

Sardar sent SMS to his BOSS: “Me sick, no work”
Boss SMS back: “When I am sick I kiss my wife try it”
2 hours later sardar sms 2 boss: “Me ok, ur wife very sweet”

Santa’s girfriend: Meri maa aapko bahut pasand karti hai.
Santa, after a deep thought: Kuchh bhi ho jaye,
shaadi to main tujhse hi karunga! .

Teacher: Translate – Bazaar mein goliyan chal rahi hain.
Santa: The Tablets are walking in the market.

Hijade ek shaadi ki badhai dene gaye.
Haye haye main to 1100 lungi.
Dusri Boli main to 2100 lungi.
Peeche se Santa bola Abey 2310 le lo usme FM bhi hai!!

Santa 2 dhobi: Ye T-Shirt Ulti kr k iron kr dena,
3 din Baad Santa:Meri T-shirt iron
ho Gyi?
Dhobi: Babuji press kese krta?
3din se ulti hi nai ayi..

SANTA: sister muje 1 bottle blood dedo, Nurse: Blood group bolo.
SANTA: koi b chalega,
Nurse: kaise chalega?
SANTA: Girlfriend ko love letter likhana
hai.

Santa: Mene Kal SANIA MIRZA Se Phone Pe Baat Ki.
Banta: That’s Great Yaar..
Usne Kya Kahaa..??
Santa: Usne Kaha Wrong Number!

Santa Aur Banta ja rahe tha. Raste Me 1000 ka note mila.
Banta- Chalo fifty Fifty le lete hain.
Santa- Baki 900 ka kya karege?

संता टीचर – जब बिजली कड़कती है तो चमक पहले दिखाई देती है और आवाज बाद में सुनाई देती है … क्यों ?
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बंता स्टूडेंट – क्योंकि हमारी आँखें आगे हैं और कान पीछे … !!!

Teacher (Giving instruction)- Start Computer.
Santa- I did.
Teacher- Now open My Computer.
Santa- Miss, where is your computer?…

1 aadmi chabi se apna kaan khuja raha tha
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Santa use dekh raha tha
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Kuch der bad bola- Bhai sahb agr app start nahi ho rahe ho to dhakka lagadu….

संता किसी लड़की के घर रिश्ता लेकर गया।
लड़की के मां-बाप बोले – “हमारी बेटी तो अभी पढ़ाई कर रही है।”
संता बोला – “कोई बात नहीं जी, हमएक घंटे बाद आ जाएंगे।”