A pastor announced,”If u know ur wife is controlling u,move to the left”. All men in the church moved to the left except one man.
.
The pastor was happy there was at least one strong man,and asked,”How come ur wife can’t control u?”
.
The man quietly replied,”Its my wife who told me not to move”.

In class: 1+1=2 (y)
Homework: 1+2+2=5 (y)
Exam:Tebogo bought 4 oranges, he ate 2 and gave peter 1,calculate the mass of the sun.

Mxm

Lebo:I love u.
Tebza:Same
Lebo:So why don’t u say it?
Tebza:Because u will smile.
Lebo:So?
Tebza:You will show ur teeth
Lebo:What’s wrong with my teeth?
Tebza:They remind me of a song.
Lebo:What song?(Blushing) Tell me.
Tebza:Black and Yellow,Black and Yellow.

Fellas,if u visit her and she puts on leggings, just know u ain’t getting past 2nd base… If the leggings are leopard print u not even gonna kiss… Head for the door quick before she gives u blue balls…

Why I stopped watching Nigerian Movies??

A man had a heart attack in the hospital & the doctor shouted…
“SOMEBODY CALL AN AMBULANCE”

Last Night i was with Trevor Noah, we were going to perform at a sell out crowd in New York. When we were about to start with the jokes…….behold…….my mother woke me up “Ronnie wake up and get ready for school”.
–
I’m still not talking to her

A Real Wife Sleeps On The Floor When
The Husband Brings A Sidechick Home!!!

Some people Chew Chappies until it turns into A Bostick.

Ronnie walks into a bar, goes to the bartender and says “give me a beer before the problem starts”
–
After drinking the 1st bottle, again he says to the bartender “give me another one before the problem starts”
–
He give him, this goes on till the 5th bottle. The bartender then asks Ronnie “when are you going to pay for your beers?”
–
Ronnie replys “eish, Now the problem starts”.

Manchester City – eyes on EPL, UEFA, FA Cup, Carabao Cup
–
Chelsea – all eyes on EPL, UEFA, FA Cup
–
Man United – all eyes on EPL, FA Cup, Uefa
–
Liverpool – all eyes on next season

I don’t like this idea of my grandmother
getting more likes than me.

Of course you are not fat,
just grab a couple of chairs and sit down.

A house girl asked her madam to increase her salary. The madam ask her to give 3 reasons why she need her salary to be increased…

*House girl:I can cook better than u
*Madam:Who told u that?
*House girl:Ur husband told me.
*Madam: OK second reason….!
*House maid:I can iron better than u.
*Madam:Who told u that?
*House girl:Ur husband told me.
*Madam:OK,last reason.
*House girl:I’m also better than u in bed(Madam got furious, grabbed a stick to smash her head)
*Madam:Did my husband say that?
*House girl:No,the driver told me I’m better than u in bed.
*Madam:Shhhh!Lower ur voice please! I will increase ur salary immediately. You’re such a hard working girl.

Witchcraft is when you work at SPUR and your ex come with his new girlfriend on her birthday
n you have to sing her

Busy telling us about your relationship here on Facebook…
Are we your online-in-laws?

Kadyo: man, do you know my dog’s intelligence.
Berto: really man? How did you say?
Kadyo: since yesterday was my neighbor asked him. 2 + 2 said. Then, he bark at four times.
Berto: is it good?
Kadyo: but there’s a problem, buddy.
Berto: oh why?
Kadyo: my neighbor asked him again 2 MILLION + 2 million. Until now, still bark. I haven’t eaten anything yet.