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*I am self employed so if you see me talking alone don’t bother to ask me , no problem ,maybe I have staff meeting



*Black parents will compare you with other kids*
_But when you compare them with other parents._
*Hehehehe my friend you will be homeless*
πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

Sing Like No One’s Listening, Love Like You’ve Never Been Hurt, Dance Like Nobody’s Watching, And Live Like it’s Heaven On Earth😌

LIFE IS ABOUT: Trusting your feelings, taking chances, finding happiness, learning from the past, and realizing everything changes


You know something is wrong, when you can’t remember the last time
you were truly happy…

If you meet a woman that admit she’s wrong, apologises and changes her ways. Dump her, that might be a man, women don’t do that..!


Parents today are afraid to beat their kids.
Meanwhile I’m here remembering the time my mother factory reset me with a slap.


Teacher: Any One Who thinks he’s stupid may stands up

Nobody stands up

Teacher: I’m sure there are some stupid student over here!!

Little Johnny stands up

Teacher: ohh Johnny you think you’re stupid?”

Little Johnny: No I just feel bad that you’re standing alone

HER: do u smoke
Me: yes
Her: how much is cigarette
Me: R3
Her: How many cigarettes do u you smoke in a day
Me: 10
Her: how long have you been smoking
Me: 15 years
Her: if you save R30 in a day you would have a new BMW now
Me: that’s true…..Can I ask you a question
Her: yes
Me: do you smoke?
Her: nop
Me: where’s your BMW🀨

My girlfriend went to study abroad and came back with a baby who looks exactly like her. I asked her what that was all about and she said that the child was given to her as a token of appreciation for her good behavior in campus. She thinks am stupid, well am not. I know she probably stole that child or something.


Every family has that Aunt who thinks her kids are better than other children,

if u don’t know her, then tht aunt is ur mother


Facebook is meant for chatting but since girls don’t reply to our messages, we are now Comedians and it is working.

got a lift from a Golf 7 GTI today it was amazin……when i got off i almost gave the guy my number, Ladies i understand now


When a girl says “Tell me about yourself ” she’s asking if u work or if u drive not this nonsense of I’m a caring & loving guy

Some People Have Only Dated One Person And Found Their SoulmatesπŸ’..And Then There’s Us Going Around Doing Auditions..