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One Man can control 16 Cows with 1 Stick 😎 Can I go deeper?



I saw a burglar breaking into his own house, I said what are you doing?
He said working from home.

Fred is 32 years old and he is still single.
One day a friend asked, “Why aren’t you married? Can’t you find a woman who will be a good wife?”
Fred replied, “Actually, I’ve found many women I wanted to marry, but when I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesn’t like them.”
His friend thinks for a moment and says, “I’ve got the perfect solution, just find a girl who’s just like your mother.”
A few months later they meet again and his friend says, “Did you find the perfect girl? Did your mother like her?”
With a frown on his face, Fred answers, “Yes, I found the perfect girl. She was just like my mother. You were right, my mother liked her very much.”
The friend said, “Then what’s the problem?”
Fred replied, “My father doesn’t like her.”

A man was walking along a California beach and stumbled across an old lamp. He picked it up and rubbed it and out popped a genie! The genie said, “OK. You released me from the lamp, blah, blah blah. This is the fourth time this month and I’m getting a little sick of these wishes. So you can forget about getting three wishes. You only get one wish. The man sat down on the beach and thought about it for awhile. Then he said, “I’ve always wanted to go to Hawaii; but I’m scared to fly and I get very seasick. Could you build me a bridge to Hawaii so that I can drive over there to visit?” The genie laughed and said, “That’s impossible! Think of the logistics of that! How would the supports ever reach the bottom of the Pacific? Think of how much concrete… how much steel…! No. Think of another wish.” The man tried to think of another wish. Finally, he said, “I’ve been married and divorced several times. My wives always said that I don’t care and that I’m insensitive. So I wish that I could understand women… know how they feel inside and what they’re thinking when they give me the silent treatment…know why they’re crying…know what they really want when they say, ‘Nothing’…know how to make them truly happy….” The genie said, “You want that bridge two lanes or four?”


Interviewer:How much milk do these cows give?
Farmer:Which one,the Black one or the Brown one?
Interviewer:The Brown one
Farmer:A couple of litres per day
Interviewer:And the black one?
Farmer:A couple of litres per day
Interviewer:They look healthy,what do you give them to eat?
Farmer:Which one,the Black or the Brow one?
Interviewer:The Brown one
Farmer:It eats Grass
Interviewer:And the black one?
Farmer:Grass
Interviewer:(Now annoyed) but why do you ask the black one or the brown one when the answers are the same?
Farmer:Because the black one its Mine
Interviewer:And the Brown one?
Farmer:Its also Mine

The problem with Beautiful girls is that they think every guy wants them


What Is Couple S**?

An 8-year-old girl went to her grandfather, who was working in the yard and asked him, “Grampa, what is couple s**?”
The grandfather was surprised that she would ask such a question, but decided that if she’s old enough to know to ask the question, then she’s old enough to get a straight answer.
Steeling himself to leave nothing out, he proceeded to tell her all about human reproduction and the joys and responsibilities of intercourse.
When he finished explaining, the little girl was looking at him with her mouth hanging open, eyes wide in amazement.
Seeing the look on her face, the grandfather asked her, “Why did you ask this question, honey?”
The little girl replied, “Grandma says that dinner will be ready in just a couple secs.


The Year is 2064
“Grandpa why do you love sitting outside?”
Me:
There was a time this was illegal

I just saw on fb that the children born 9 months from now will be know as the ‘children of the quarn’ and I can’t stop giggling

Fellas if she rejects you
Tell her exactly what she looks like


Next time when they shout “something big is coming your way in 2020” don’t just shout “I receive!!”.
First ask “what is that?”…


After this Corona, people must understand why dogs run out when you open a gate and stop beingharsh on them. Staying indoors is not child’s play.

You know something is wrong, when you can’t remember the last time you were truly happy…


You deserve that person that is more observant of the BEAUTY of your Heart than your physical Beauty…💛
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You deserve that person that values the LITTLE things just as much as the BIG things about you…💚
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You deserve someone that doesn’t just BELIEVE in kissing your lips but wants to kiss your soul…💙
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When you fall in love with someone that loves like you do you will never have to remind them of the things you’re deserving of because they will express daily and willingly the many ways to say I LOVE YOU…💜

For the 1st time in history,
every woman knows where her Man is..!