If your girlfriend has friends she calls, boo, bish,bestie,galfriend
my broda that is the board of directors that ruins your relationship

If you think a shot of an AK47 gun is loud* *then you have never*
*heard a sound of a falling pot lid* *
when you are trying to steal meat at night* 🍯

This year I wanna meet a girl with books and files bump into her then they fall… We pick them up together look into each other’s eyes and live happily ever after

On the 31st December, I hired 20 people on my non existant company, bcos I was drunk. Now they keep calling me, they wanna start working. What can I do guys?

Good luck to learners who were doing Maths and Physics
the rest of you guys come on it’s not that difficult

When Did You Realise You Were An Adult ? 😕😒

Me: it Was When Christmas came And There Was No Talk About
Christmas And New Year’s Clothes 😣😭😭 .. You ?

On my wedding day any woman that will look more pretty than my wife
will be chased out, i hate confusion

The person who lost a black Huawei P20 in Carlton Centre yesterday,
please bring its charger and headphones.

Guys what happens to a car when you press
brake and acceleration at the same time…
Will it take a screenshot shot?

Why do alcohol companies use models 4 their
adverts?? Are they ashamed of their real
customers??

I was talking to myself last night and
we both agreed that you’re crazy..

WEED is Dangerous
I can’t believe i finished 1L of Vinegar thinking it’s Wine🍷….

My neighbour is busy complaining about her lost chicken,
mxm it wasn’t even delicious

For those asking me hore how is 2019 pls stop,
am also new here only 4 days

Her: bro your face looks familiar
Me: ok
Her: you know Gadaffi from generations
Me:😁😎yes i do
Her: you look like his friend cosmo

I’m tired of the Russians and their Russian beer.
I want them to also support us South Africans with our new whisky