Boss said to secretary “I want to
have sex with you just once, I’ll be
quick. I’ll pay you R1,000. I’ll
throw the money on the floor
and before you bend down to
pick it, I’ll be done. She calls and
tells her boyfriend. “Its okay but
ask for R2000 and be very quick
to pick the money”. After 4 hours
of waiting,the boyfriend calls his
girlfriend “what happened baby??
then The girl replied..”The
bastard used coins; I’m still
picking the money

She made me choose between
Alcohol and her Sometimes I miss her yaz

When you see a guy smiling while chatting ..
Just know that someone’s daughter has fallen into his trap .

10 mins ago I was bored. So I decided to call the police.
Me: Hello, help.
Police: What happened?
Me: 5000 people are following me.
Police: Calm down, where are you?
Me: Facebook!
Police: Idiot!!!

An announcement to all members of this App. We are humbly requesting you all to leave the App tomorrow morning from 9am to 1pm. *we want to PAINT the room*. Christmas is approaching, thank you!

I was in a church last Saturday, a male and female were sitting next to me. I was so shocked when the female started to pull her dress up and lift the bra and the male started sucking her nipple like there was no body watching them… the female was around 28yrs and the male is just 3 months old. Thanks for reading,
I’m in my house if you like come and beat me.

*BAD LUCK* *is when the wind blows a
Girl’s skirt up, and the same wind blows
dust into your eyes.
And u end up seeing nothing*

Son-In-Law To Father-In-Law:

Dear Dad,

I Deeply Regret Taking Petrol Car In Dowry, Please Take Your Daughter Or Car Back. Can’t Afford Both.

Regards,
Your Lovey Son-In-Law

*Some girls are really funny, you expect your boyfriend to be rich in his 20’s yet your father is is still broke in his 60’s …. my sister what are you smoking, Tear gas??

There Are Basically 7 Types Of Girls…

1. Hard Disk Girls: Remember Everything Forever.

2. Ram Girls: Forgets About You The Moment You Turn Her Off.

3. Screen Saver Girls: Just For Looking.

4. Internet Girls: Difficult To Access.

5. Server Girls: Always Busy When Needed.

6. Multimedia Girls: Makes Horrible Things Looks Beautiful.

7. Virus Girls: These Type Of Girls Are Normally Called Wife Once Enters In Your System Don’t Leave Even After Format

My Ex works in a pharmacy,
so whenever I want to spoil her mood
I just go there and buy condom for no reason
sometimes I go 3 times a day

Husband was sipping his whisky, while sitting in the balcony with wife.
He says,
“I love you so much, I don’t know how I could ever live without you.”
Wife asks, “Is that you, or the whisky talking?”
Husband replies, “It’s me… talking to whisky.”

If God is a ​Police Officer
How many times would you have been ​fined​ or arrested
for parking your life wrongly? Over loading with Lusts and Pleasures of the world? Not carrying the Fire Extinguisher always (Bible)? Over Speeding (Going Ahead of God’s Plans)? Driving without a License (Holy Spirit)? Not observing Traffic Lights (commandments)? And forgetting to put on your Safety Belt (Prayer)? Think about it…. SPREAD THE GOSPEL