Hardest part in a relationship is:
“Babe borrow me your phone”..!

Ladies just a quick reminder “Men don’t forgive cheating”..!

Dear sis Dolly,
I’m married for 17 years now. Every time my wife and I
have a misunderstanding she demands transport money
for her 3 brothers who stay in Pretoria to come and
beat me up here in Durban .
After they have beaten me, I must still give them
transport money back to Pretoria.
What can I do please? I’m spending a lot. – Siya.
.
Sis Dolly:
“Dear Siya, I completely sympathize with you. I suggest
you and your wife just move to Pretoria to save costs..

This Thing Of Sleeping With Phone in Hands,
Now I Bought A House Online

The Ability To Control Tears When Food Doesn’t Reach You At A Function/Occasion Is The Highest Level Of Maturity

I gave my neighbors kid R100 to buy a sack of potato for R90 for me, I said he must keep R10 change for helping. This chap came back eating biscuits and gave me R90 change, he says the sack of potatoes is R95

Fake Friends – Never ask for food🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩 🍻🍻🍻..
Real Friends – Are the reason you have NO food!🍶🍶🍶 🍩🍩🍩🍺🍺🍺
Fake Friends – Call your parents mr. / Mrs.👫👫👪
Real Friends – Call your parents Dad / Mom👫👫👫👫
Fake Friends – Never have seen you cry..😞😒😞
Real Friends – Cry with you😭😭😭😭
Fake Friends – Borrow your stuff for a few days, then give it back🎳🎳
Real Friends – Keep your stuff so long, they forget it’s yours!🔨🔨 🔩🔩
Fake Friends – Know a few things about you..🎆
Real Friends – Could write a book about you📝📝📝📝💾
Fake Friends – Would knock on your front door.. 🐢🐢
Real Friends – Walk right in and say
“I’m home!”🐤🐤🐤
Fake Friends – Will help you up when you fall over😑😑😑
Real Friends – Will jump on top of you and shout “dog pile!”😁😁
Fake Friends – Are around for a while..😒😒
Real Friends – Are for life🙌🙌
Fake Friends – Say “like you” in a joking manner😒😒
Real Friends – say “I like you” and they mean it☺☺
Fake Friends – will read this.😒😒
Real Friends- will comment his/her best friend name

Yeses:
When I was Younger :•
I’d put my arms in my shirt 👕 and told people I lost my arms 💪
• Would restart the video game whenever I knew I was going to lose❎🚫
• Had that one pen with four colors, and tried to push all the buttons at once😔
• Waited behind a door 🚪 to scare someone, then leaving because they’re taking too long to come out 🚶 .
• Faked being asleep, so I couldbe carried to bed🏠
• Used to think that the moon🌚followed our car🚗
• Tried to balance the switch between On/ Off💢.
• Watching two drops of rain roll down window 💦 pretending itwas a race 🏁 .
• The only thing i had to takecare of was a school bag 👝 .
• Swallowed a fruit seed I was scared to death that a tree 🎄 was going to grow in my tummy.
• Closed the fridge extremely slowly to see when the lights went off😜👀.
• Walked into a room,. forgot what you needed😕, Walked out,and then remember😮.
If u really went through this can u drop a”HI”

Losing a girlfriend or boyfriend it’s nothing
Imagine loosing free facebook some of us will be offline
for the next 5 years

Fake Friends – Never ask for food🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩 🍻🍻🍻..
Real Friends – Are the reason you have NO food!🍶🍶🍶 🍩🍩🍩🍺🍺🍺
Fake Friends – Call your parents mr. / Mrs.👫👫👪
Real Friends – Call your parents Dad / Mom👫👫👫👫
Fake Friends – Never have seen you cry..😞😒😞
Real Friends – Cry with you😭😭😭😭
Fake Friends – Borrow your stuff for a few days, then give it back🎳🎳
Real Friends – Keep your stuff so long, they forget it’s yours!🔨🔨 🔩🔩
Fake Friends – Know a few things about you..🎆
Real Friends – Could write a book about you📝📝📝📝💾
Fake Friends – Would knock on your front door.. 🐢🐢
Real Friends – Walk right in and say
“I’m home!”🐤🐤🐤
Fake Friends – Will help you up when you fall over😑😑😑
Real Friends – Will jump on top of you and shout “dog pile!”😁😁
Fake Friends – Are around for a while..😒😒
Real Friends – Are for life🙌🙌
Fake Friends – Say “like you” in a joking manner😒😒
Real Friends – say “I like you” and they mean it☺☺
Fake Friends – will read this.😒😒
Real Friends- will comment his/her best friend name

Today, I met my ex and she was kissing her new boyfriend in front of a store, I was watching them and she saw me then she asked me what I was doing there. I told her my wife is pregnant and I am here to buy baby stuffs and I am very very happy. I spoke as if they asked me that.

I proceeded in as she was looking at me, I bought 3 buckets, a baby seat and a baby bed with sponge with soaps then I chattered a taxi and left. She and her boyfriend were looking at me and I felt they envied me sooo much.

Now, my issue is, if you know any woman who has given birth, I am selling buckets, baby seat, soaps and sponge. I am around Boksburg, Commissioner street

Love used to be blind but now
it has received its treatment.
Now it looks at u, ur pocket, ur family &
social status & even ur bank account balance too.

If you think somebody is giving you a fake numbers,
read it back to them incorrectly. See if they’ll correct you.