The judge says to a double murder defendant, “You’re charged with beating your wife to death with a hammer.”
A voice at the back of the courtroom yells out, “You bastard!”
The judge says, “You’re also charged with beating your mother-in-law to death with the same hammer.”
The voice in the back of the courtroom yells out, “You ROTTEN bastard!”
The judge stops and says to the man in the back of the courtroom. “Sir, I can understand your anger and frustration at these crimes, but no more outbursts from you, or I’ll charge you with contempt. Is that understood?”
The man stands up and says, “I’m sorry, Your Honour, but for fifteen years I’ve lived next door to that arsehole, and every time I asked if I could borrow a hammer, he said he didn’t have one”.


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