Imagine dating a guy who walks around carrying a Bluetooth speaker
making noise

I took a taxi from bus rank yesterday although I knew very well that I did not have money to pay.😖When we stopped at a robot,😶
I quickly got out of the taxi and I fled away🏃‍♂️.
Unfortunately there was also a Police Officer in the taxi.
He got out too and chased me 🏃🏿👮🏼.
In my zigzag run I only managed to get for some distance😞😫.
The cop was catching up😨…He took out his gun and shouted “Freeze😠”! I stopped running😦 and raised my hands to surrender😞.
The cop pointed his gun at me andSays”Bro🤨.. ,just keep on running🏃‍♂️ so that I keep chasing you🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️… I also don’t have money to pay the taxi driver

Stop it I liiike it

Ngrrrrrrrr ngrrrrrrr
Him::: Hello bbes
Her:::::hi Sam..I called to tell you that j can’t do this anymore..it’s getting hard by the day
Him::::can’t do what exactly?
Her:::I mean ,you don’t even have a car ..how will we go out ?
Him:::: hey hey hey ..hold up!…do YOU have a car ?
Her::no I don’t,But you’re a man and you’re the one who’s supposed to make a plan and have a car
Him:::ohhh I see ..so all the women that have cars,,are men ..is that what you’re telling me?
Her:::nooo no no
Him:::ohk ..does your father have a car ?
Her::::be he doesn’t Sam,, but that’s besides the point 🤷‍♀️
Him::::point my foot,,,you have 5 brothers ,do they have cars ?
Her:::no bbe they don’t but…
Him:::But what huh?

Don’t come up with stories..find R10 and come see me tomorrow 9am ..I’ll be home

Her::::ok bbe I’m sorry ..see you tomorrow

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Volume gents how far

Can we also celebrate those young women who refuse to have a child out of wedlock,uneducated and unemployed. These girl’s sense of responsibility needs to be celebrated as well instead of being labelled “infertile”, I’m just saying “😑

I Wear What my Mom Can Afford
Adidos ,Mike ,Pamu ,Bucci ,
Esselle , Redbird etc

When Superman flies you call him a hero but when our grannies fly you call them witches 🧙🏽‍♀️.. Is it because they are ugly?

Am i the only one who goes house 🏡 to house 🏡 and introduce my girlfriend after getting in a new relationship???

Usualy i mind my own business but
when i see someone beefing on facebook
i read all 884 coments

“Its over between us”
These words will make u look for your shoes👟in the fridge😂😂😂

Broke Men
Let’s share our best lines I’ll start..
Eish babe you should have told me yesterday now i used all the cash

Just yesterday on Nat Geo Wild, it was announced that a very dangerous snake had just been discovered. Scientists claim that the snake is an enhanced specie of the reptile family. According to Nat Geo Wild, the snake increases 0.5 cm in length every time it feeds and it feeds every 30 seconds or less. This particular snake cannot be killed or harmed by weapon it dies only when it bites itself. Surprising huh? Scientists claim that’s the only way it can be killed but researches are still ongoing to discover new ways this snake can be killed. This is the most poisonous and deadliest snake ever recorded in the history of man. This snake can only be found in Nokia 3310 mobile phone under game option, Snake Xenzia Thanks for carefully and patiently reading this through

Once The Conversation Moves From Messenger to WhatsApp…
Forget chatting, you’re just going to look at each other’s statuses..!

Imagine when you are about to give an offering in church with your last money and she texts you “buy con**** I’m on my way”. I swear the devil will win this battle with most guys.

They should have just let me study medicine with my level 2 maths. I was just gonna focus on small diseases like flu and headache

When a man says he will marry you, then he will. There is no need of reminding him every 10 years 🤭

When a Boyfriend goes to University there is still hope,But when a Girlfriend goes !! My Brother its Over