A man is sent to prison for the first time. At night, the lights in the cell block are turned off, and his cellmate goes over to the bars and yells, “Number twelve!” The whole cell block breaks out laughing. A few minutes later, somebody else in the cell block yells, “Number four!” Again, the whole cell block breaks out laughing.
The new guy asks his cellmate what’s going on. “Well,” says the older prisoner, “we’ve all been in this here prison for so long, we all know the same jokes. So we just yell out the number instead of saying the whole joke.”
So the new guy walks up to the bars and yells, “Number twenty-nine!” This time the whole cell block rocks with the loudest laughter, prisoners rolling on the floor laughing hysterically.
When the guffaws die down, the bewildered new guy turns to the older prisoner and asks, “How come you guys were laughing so hard this time?”
“Oh,” says the older man wiping tears from his eyes, “we’d never heard that one before!”
A lawyer meets with the family of a recently deceased millionaire for the reading of the will.
“To my loving wife, Rose, who always stood by me, I leave the house and $2 million,” the attorney reads.
“To my darling daughter, Jessica, who looked after me in sickness and kept the business going, I leave the yacht, the business and $1 million.”
“And finally,” the lawyer concludes, “to my cousin Nyaa, who hated me, argued with me and thought I would never mention him in my will. Well, you were wrong” (Nyaa smiles hysterically)
And the lawyer continued…
“To my cousin Nyaa, who hated me, argued with me and thought I would never mention him in my will. Well, you were wrong,
Hi Nyaa!”
A nurse lost her cat in a hospital..she asked: Any one got a pussy?
All the woman stood up.
No I meant has any one seen a pussy?.All the men stood up.
No No No… she said “I meant has any one seen my pussy”?
All the doctors stood up
Nyaa in class
Teacher: I want you guys to write a story..A composition,”Assume that you were in a war in 300 words”
Students starts to write while Nyaa folds his arms.The teacher approached Nyaa,
Teacher: Why are you not writing?
Nyaa: They killed me….immediately at the beginning of the war.
Nagtaka ang tanga kung paano nalaman na tanga siya
(Kinabukasan bumalik ang tanga nagsuot ng salamin, kurbata, longsleeves, slacks at nagdala ng laptop)
NADARANG ( mama version )
Nandiyan ka nanaman, Ba’t di mo hinugasan, Pinggan na pinagkainan? Tinamad ka nanaman kaka’cellphone, Bakit ba di mo yan mabitawan?
