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Nowadays the story you hear about yourself
will make you wonder if someone is using your body elsewhere

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In 2019 😁
.
On the funeral program there must be the one
who will speak for those who were warning him

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I once blocked my mother’s slap👋
after that she told all the relatives that l was tryin to kill her

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You’re still busy laughing at pirates while
they’re are busy laughing at your report at school

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MTH101

If Chelsea lost 3-1 to Tottenham and lost 2-1 to wolves, calculate the margin in which they’re going to lose to city. Use hazard as the subject of the formula.

If Man city = X
Tottenham’s position = 3
Tottenham won (3-1)
Wolves’ position = 12
Wolves won (2-1)
Chelsea’s position = 4

X= 3 *(3-1)+12 *(2-1)/4

X= 3*2 + 12*1 /4

X =6 +12/4

X= 18/4

X = 4.5 ~5

X= 5

Manchester city will beat Chelsea by 5 goals

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Beauty has sent a lot of girls into marriage
but character is busy packing them out!

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Imagine you in church and this SMS comes in”,
your uncle is drinking ur 🍺 beers”

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When you are about to laugh loud then boom
you remember your matric results

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Boy: ang lamig siguro ng lips mo
Girl:(kinikilig) Bakit mo nasabi?
Boy:nagyeyelo kasi ngipin mo😂
Girl:😡😠😤😾😼

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BALITANG BALITA!! SA RADYONG SIRA!” 📻 “” 📼 ”
1. Isang isda” 🐟 “” 🐠 ” nalunod.Patay!” 🙏 “” 🔫 ”
2. Dalawang kalbo “👽 “nagsabunutan” 👊 “, dalawang kuto sugatan!” 🔫 “” 🀄 ”
3. Isang bahay” 🏠 “na walang hagdan, inakyat!⇧” 😂 ”
4. Sementeryo nasunog” 🔥 “” 🔥 “, lahat patay” 🔫 “” 💨 ”
5. Isang bakla” 😏 “ginahasa” 😷 ” tuwang tuwa!” 😂 “” 😂 ”
6. Isang kuba naligo sa dagat,” 🌊 “pinagkamalang pawikan!” 😜 “” ❓”
7. Aso” 🐶 ” patay✘, pitong garapata sugatan!” 🀄 ”
8. Buntis” 👩 “binaril, fetus” 👶 “nakailag!” 😂 ”
9.Factory ng Katol” 🏭 “nilalamok!” 😂 ”
10. Isang unggoy” 🐒 “tumatawa” 😂 ” habang nagbabasa ng post ngayon!
HAHAHA

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Don’t let people treat you like a cigarette,
only use you when bored and step on you when they’re done.
Be like drugs, let them die for you..♥👌

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When my siblings make me angry,
I look at them through the fork and pretend they’re in jail
😏
It heals me spiritually

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BREAKING NEWS
Gauteng Police just found two heads in a student’s bag coming from a well known casino… The student is believed to be a grade 11 pupil which cannot be named at this point.The young student, about 17 years old, got into a uber with a big handbag from the casino heading towards town but the taxi driver felt a strong smell of human blood coming from her handbag… She claimed she was going to deliver some meat to a friend whom she identified as Phelisa. She claimed she works for a butchery part time on weekends and the smell was coming from the meat she was carrying!The horrible smell made the uber driver highly suspicious because he once worked as a mortuary attendant so he was very familiar with the smell of heads. He insisted to check the bag and discovered the two heads. The girl, was held and taken to the police station.Many were frightened, not knowing what was happening, One of the Police officials was shocked when he opened the 17-year-old girl’s bag and found two (2) heads…In examining them carefully, the authorities found that they were two known heads, it was a head of a garlic and the other of an onion.
Thank you very much for your attention!!! But you like stories huh🙄🙄Now you can continue what you were doing.

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If You Girlfriend Comes Home Late.. After School Hours & Tells You That
” Today At School We Had Fun..
Brother She’s Cheating On You..
There’s Nothing Fun At School..Trust Me

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Kidnapper : I will rape you all..!
Grand child : you can rape me but please leave my grandmother alone
Grandmother : leave who? For what? War is war! everyone must face the consequences

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You’ve Been A Parent All Year Around 🔥♥ ,
So Don’t Go into A Depression Because Of
What You Can’t Afford To Buy Your Kids For Christmas 😥😪 .. PLEASE! 🙏

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