Sub Categories

Usually people who like to post on other people’s wall

Are the same kind of people who love writing
“I Was Here” in buses and public toilets



I went to a night prayer in one church😐

So in the midst of the prayer session a member touched my shoulder and said “You Will Walk”😯

I didn’t understand because im not disabled..
But after church I realised my transport money had been Stolen

You Wanna See His True Colours?
Tell Him You’re Pregnant!!!

Husband : Honey Let’s Play Hide And Seek?
Wife : No, Last Time We Played It I Couldn’t Find You
And You Came Back 15 February!!!


Insecure guy
.
Guy: bae where are you??? Girl: I’m in church
love ! Guy: Give Jesus the phone.

Kissing a short person is like
drinking water
from the tap


A chinese guy walks into a bar

Ronnie : “hey, do you know Kung fu?”

Chinese : “no why is it because i’m a chinese?”

Ronnie : “no it’s because you are drinking my beer”

Chinese ran away!!


SA BINYAGAN..
PARI: ANO ANG IPAPANGALAN NYO SA BATA?
NANAY: CONDOM PO PADER.
PARI: BAKIT NAMAN GANYAN ANG IPAPANGALAN? HINDI SYA MAGANDA SA PANDINIG.
NANAY: COMBINATION PO NG PANGALAN NG LOLA AT LOLO PO NIYA PADER. SI LOLA CONSUELO AT LOLO DOMINGO.
PARI: PANGET TLAGA BASTOS PAKINGGAN .. SIGE MAS OKEY SIGURO KUNG COMBINATION NLNG NINYO NG MISTER MO.
ANO BA PANGALAN MO?
NANAY: KANDICE PO PADER.
PARI: OK SO… “KAN” ANG UMPISA NG PANGALAN NYA. SI MISTER PO BA ANO PANGALAN?
NANAY: TOTOY O TOTO PO.
NASHOCK SI PADER.
PARI: NAKU JUSKOPO. SIGE CONDOM NLNG MAS CUTE.
HAHAHAHA😂😂😂

Witchcraft Is When Your Dad Is Unemployed And Your Momm Turns The Volume Up When It Is Uzalo’s Theme Song “Amanye Amadoda Ayaphumelela!!!”.

Mistress: when are you leaving your wife?
Mister: now, I come home.
* hasted came home at home *
Mister: we need to talk.
Wife: I also have to say.
Mister: it’s important to me.
My wife: that’s mine too.
Mister: you don’t understand… I don’t want…
Wife: I won the lotto 100 million! What are you going to say? You said I don’t want…
Mister: AA… I don’t want you… I love you.. I love you


I know today may be difficult to get through.
If it would help to have my love wrapped
around you this morning,
consider yourself wrapped.
Good Morning


Ladies Please Repeat After Me;

“My Boyfriend’s Money, Is My Money Too!!!”

I AM A WOMAN!!! –

So what?
I get into an argument with a man, he slaps me, I feel the pain, yet they tell me I provoked him. I should have been quiet, I should have been patient. I should apologize to him.

I get into an argument with a man, I slap him, they tell me I have no respect, no home training. I should have been quiet, I should have been patient. I should apologize to him.
Because I am a woman, I don’t have a right to be angry. So, the degree of my innocence is directly proportional to the degree of my silence in the face of oppression and brutality…..

Because I am a woman, my husband cheats on me, I am told to tolerate it to save my marriage. The barbaric and stupid excuse is that ”it is in their nature to cheat, I should slim down, dress better, cook better, pray harder and be more pleasant to him”

I cheat, and I am called a whore, I have committed an abomination, I have no right to look elsewhere for the love and emotional support I lack at home, I am an irresponsible mother.

So I am sent packing, from the home we both built, with all my earthly possessions stuffed into a tiny box on my head. I am henceforth forbidden from seeing my two older children, I’m lucky to be allowed to go with my little one still suckling on my left breast. Three years later, the little one is tagged a bastard. Now, my new name is “after-three”, because I am a woman.

He is 28 and runs a company. He’s tagged wonderful, hardworking, focused, career oriented, successful at a very young age.

I am 28 and I run a company ” Hmmmm, she is not even married, unserious, can not order her priorities right, a hustler, loves money, let her go and get a husband oh”
And I wonder if being successful has anything to do with a person’s gender.

Because I am a woman,
I am not allowed to have wits or be a prodigy, I cannot be financially buoyant, professionally successful or be treated with respect without a man beside me.

Then I am tagged a generous leg opener, “a runs girl”. They never see the possibility that I actually had to go through ups and downs to get to where I am.
Because I am a woman.

A man looses his wife to death and remarries a year after, he did the right thing, he’s being praised and congratulated for moving on, after all life is for the living.

A woman looses her husband to death and remarries after 4yrs, “ahhh! so early? Are u sure she wasn’t sleeping with that man even when her husband was alive? That was why she killed her husband. She’s a witch! ” Because she’s a woman.

Because I am a woman, this post will be considered controversial, and everyone will try to correct me.
But don’t forget, that I am a woman and it does not make me less human!!!
Share to respect some woman.


Y MEN R NOT ALLOWED 2 RUN ADVICE IN LOVE COLUMNS IN MAGAZINES N NEWS PAPERS
Hi uncle Nyaa: “I am a lady aged 26, I left my husband wit de maid n baby @ home n I drove 4 just about 2km from home.
My car engine started 2 overheat, so I had 2 turn back n get another car.
When I got home I found my husband in bed wit our maid, I don know wat 2 do now, pls help me.”
.
.
.
.
.
Uncle Nyaa’s Reply: “Overheating of engine after such a short distance can b caused by problems associated wit de radiator.
U need 2 check oil n water level in ur engine b4 u start ur journey.
U must also make sure ur car is serviced regularly 2 avoid problems in future, hope dis will help!!!
Oh one more thing if it does happen, don go back home, call ur insurance.”

TODAY, Don’t think of saying any UNKIND W0RD, think of the people who can’t speak.
Don’t complain about the FOOD yu eat,
some have nothing.
Don’t complain about LYFE, many die
young.
When you’re TIRED of your job, think of the jobless, the disabled & those who wish they had urs.
When SAD TH0UGHTS seem to put you
down, paint a SMILE on your face & thank GOD you’re alive n you’re still around.
LYFE’s a gift. LIVE IT WELL

I wish to belong to you,
I’ll be the one you’re looking for and
we’ll be the one heaven’s searching for!