Ngifuna umuntu owazi ugesi, onesitifiketi, ikhadi lami leValentine engalinikwa ngibuya kwi-conference alisakhali.

Dudlu ntombi! Angina-Polo Vivo, angina-GTI kodwa ngine Wi-Fi endlini yami. Amaqanda ang’wabali, ungaphohloza noma amangaki. Ngiqome ntokazi!

Selokhu ngayeka insangu, sengicabanga izinto ezijulile.

What if February usho ukuthi feba unga-worry?

Phakathi komuntu wakho nekhansela langakini, ubani onamanga kakhulu?

Ukujola nami kumnandi ngoba uthola i-comedian, uhlanya kanye ne-porn star, all in one person. Ngiyi-combo kahle kahle

My neighbor bought another kind of chicken, something that runs while you are still spraying sneakers.

*Imagine seeing your Ex Wyf in her new boyfriend’s car with your child, then your child sees you and shouts “Daddy futsek”*

Ungaba muhle, ugqoke kahle kodwa indaba ilapha.

*esho ekhomba*

Oyokhala emngcwabeni wami ningisize nimphuce ipleti, akhalele into ayaziyo.

Umuntu abhale i-post la kuFacebook athi: “Life though. ”

Umbuze ukuthi kwenzenjani, athi: “Inbox please.”

Uma ufika ku-inbox, athi: “Let’s WhatsApp.”
Ku-WhatsApp athi: “Call me.”

Umfonele, athi: “Let’s meet.”
Uma nihlangana athi: “You won’t understand.”

Abantu abayeke insangu, nx!

Ey, uyicinge i-mayonnaise kwaNongoma kanti ibhalwe ukuthi Ushuni Wesaladi.

: “Babe, uyazi umuhle kanjani?”

: “Le mali oyibonile Gugu, eyokuthenga usimende!”

Kulo nyaka akukho muntu oyothwasa, akhona ama ARVs ema-clinic.

Dear Debonairs,

Bengicela nitshele abasebenzi ukuthi ngicela basike equal pieces ngoba siyaxabana uma sesidla namagenge.

Ave nibhora uma senizi-like(la) kuqala, nisenza abantu ababi.

Mina i-mop ngiyifaka kayi-one emanzini ngi-cleane 4 room yonke