INTERNATIONAL RULES OF MANHOOD

1. Under no circumstances may two men share an
umbrella.

2. It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the
following
circumstances:
a. When a heroic dog dies to save its
master.
b. The moment Julie G. starts unbuttoning her
blouse.
c. After wrecking your boss’ car.
d. One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into “The
Crying Game”.
e. When she is using her teeth.

3. Any man who brings a camera to a bachelor party
may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.

4. Unless he murdered someone in your family, you
must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.

5. If you’ve known a guy for more than 24 hours,
his sister is off limits forever unless you actually
marry her.

6. Moaning about the brand of free beer in
a buddy’s fridge is forbidden. However complain at
will if the temperature is unsuitable.

7. No man shall
never be required to buy a birthday
present for another man. In fact, even remembering
your buddy’s birthday is strictly optional.